User blog:Hipper/Epic Crap Battles: Willy Wonka vs Dr. Eggman



In today's beautiful rap battle, we have candy maker and former owner of the Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory Willy Wonka rapping against evil scientist and antagonist of the Sonic games Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik.

Intro
EPIC CRAP BATTLES!

WILLY WONKA

VS

DR. EGGMAN

BEGIN!

Dr. Eggman
A candy man vs a scientist? Hah! It's obvious that I'm the winner here!

I've got a IQ of 300; I'll leave you and all your Oompa Loompas quivering in fear!

You have a tiny little factory? Oh please! I have an entire sentiment!

We're talking battle bots and doomships! I won't need some stupid Golden Ticket!

There's nothing you can do, Willy! I'll be building Eggmanland all over once I lyrically beat you down!

Your verse is coming up, but why even try? I'm afraid our little game ends now!

Willy Wonka
My Golden Geese must be acting up again; because you're quite certainly a Bad Egg, Man.

This battle will end up just like your series; heading straight down the trash can.

You're fatter than Augustus Gloop! Are you sure you haven't been eating too much of my candy?

I'm not usually the one for humor, but I'm sure your bars will make me laugh more than my Laffy Taffy.

Your name sounds awful! You should've just sticked with Robotnik!

And unlike you, I'm actually successful! Tell me, when's the last time you beat Sonic?

Dr. Eggman
Make fun of me weight all you want! You're just Veruca Salty from my disses!

That factory of yours should've stayed closed down! The food there is completely Slugworth-less!

My raps are vicious! My plans are malicious! I'm dropping chocolate bars that are scrumdiddlyumptious!

Quit playing with your Fun Dip and fly away in that not so Great Glass Elevator!

Compared to me, you're an Oompa Loompa Doompety Dope! Nothing can top this egg empowered inventor!

My Death Egg is coming in! You better Escape from the City or else I'll destroy your entire chocolate plantation!

With a foe so weak, I didn't even need to bust out my greatest creation!

Willy Wonka
I bring joy to children everywhere; nothing you make even comes close to decent.

Somebody hand me my whisk; I'm about to give this egg man a beating.

You got betrayed by Metal Sonic, it's not a secret that your scariness level couldn't be any milder.

I've got Genes in my blood, I'll bring levels of Depp-th that'll scramble your eggs Wilder.

You talk Big with your plans, but the only thing I see growing is your blubber. I've been making candy for years, I'm the master while you're just the amateur.

Let's this end quick, shall we? YOU GET NOTHING! YOU LOSE! GOOD DAY SIR!

Ending
Who won? Who's next? You decide!

Poll
 Who won? Willy Wonka Dr. Eggman 