Description[]
Hellsing VS Fables! A fuckmothering vampire against an unkillable werewolf...this should be interesting.
Fight[]
Hellsing Headquarters
"Walter...where is Alucard?" Integra Hellsing asked her butler, the deadly Walter C. Dornez.
"He went for another one of those walks you love so much." Walter answered.
"Goddammit." Integra said, picking up the phone and dialing a number she was tired of dialing
Fabletown
Alucard stood in the street.
"Well shit I'm lost"
Suddenly, his ringtone went off.
Answering it, stopping the tune from playing, he said into the speaker:
"Whaaaaaaat?"
"Alucard where are you?" Integra asked.
"I'm in a place called... Fab lee Town." Alucard said, squinting as he read a sign. I walked around New York for a while looking for a hook- I mean a map, and found myself here."
"Please get back here without causing a mass murder this time and maybe I'll buy you another flat screen TV." Integra said, hanging up.
"Are you realy going to buy him that?" Walter asked.
"Fuck no."
Back in Fabletown, Alucard wandered around and saw a man staring at him. His apparel of a red trenchcoat and hat did catch the eye.
"Fuck you lookin' at?" Alucard asked, baring his vampire fangs.
The man screamed and ran away. All of this had been seen by one Bigby Wolf.
He walked out of the shadows.
"Hey!" he shouted at Alucard.
The vampire turned to see Bigby glaring at him.
"The hell do you want?" he asked, annoyed at the man.
"Fables need to stay in their human forms at all times! You can't go around flashing your fancy vampire teeth to Mundies!" he shouted.
"Fable...is that how that's prounounced? Anyway, I'll have you know that I'm sure as hell not whatever a "fable" is, and I have no idea what a "mundy" is either, but I'm proud to be a fuckmothering vampire, and if you don't piss off right now I'll rip off your goddamn head, and cram it so far up your ass you'll get a tour of your own digestive system, Magic School Bus style."
Bigby was confused. What did he just say about a magic school bus? Suddenly, Alucard pulled out two large handguns and pointed them in Bigby's direction.
Bigby decided that he had no choice other than to go into his half wolf form, which he did right in front of Alucard.
"Ohh a werewolf. I've never killed one of those before." he said gleefully.
"Not happening." Bigby snarled.
Here we go![]
Alucard raised his guns and fired at Bigby, hitting him 5 times in the chest and face. Bigby healed from the shots with ease and sprinted towards Alucard.
Bigby used his claws to slash open Alucard's chest. Blood spurted everywhere, but the wound quickly closed up.
"Looks like we both heal fast. This should be...interesting!" Alucard said.
BLAM!
Alucard blew a hole in Bigby's head. Blood splattered the pavement. The hole on the sheriff's head closed up and he tripped Alucard and pinned him to the ground. He slashed at Alucard's throat, piercing it and causing even more blood to spray out from the vampire.
Alucard picked up his gun and shot Bigby in the chest, the force of the bullet knocking Bigby off of him.
Alucard grabbed his other handgun and unloaded the rest of his bullets on the werewolf before he could get up.
Bigby slowly stood up as Alucard reloaded. Bigby lunged at Alucard, but the vampire shot him in the face without even looking, knocking him down as Alucard reloaded his other gun.
Bigby stood up and growled.
"Somebody's angry." Alucard remarked, which only pissed off the Big Bad Wolf even more.
Bigby slashed at Alucard's hands, knocking the guns away, then sliced open his face.
Alucard kicked Bigby in the gut and punched him across the face. He tried for a jab to Bigby's nose, but the punch was caught, and Alucard was flipped over Bigby's shoulder, landing on the ground with a loud thud.
Groaning, he rolled out of the way of another slash.
"Will you just die already! Now I know how people feel when they fight me!" Alucard shouted annoyed.
He punched Bigby in the face, then kneed him in the stomach. He ran back over where his guns were lying on the ground and shot Bigby right where the sun doesn't shine.
Bigby yelled in pain.
Hellsing OST - Bellflowers Which Smell Properly
Bigby's eyes lit up with rage. He began to change again. This time, he was in his full wolf form, the form that was able to destroy entire armies with ease.
Platinum Series 1 - Dark Rider
Alucard smiled and fired off more shots. Bigby didn't even flinch as he ran at Alucard, leaping on him and tearing his throat out. Alucard picked him up and threw him so hard he went through on of the top windows of a tall building.
Alucard quickly made his way up to the same floor and began to fire at Bigby more. They eventually made their way to the roof of the building.
Alucard wrestled the wolf over to the edge.
"You were right about one thing...you aren't gonna be the first werewolf I kill. Because we can't kill each other. But I wonder if a 20 story fall is enough to get you off my back!"
Alucard kicked Bigby as hard as he could, sending the wolf hurdling off the edge. He pulled out his guns and shot Bigby as many times as he could before he hit the ground.
The fall broke pretty much every bone in Bigby's body and knocked him out cold.
Alucard sighed with relief.
"Finally. Now to get my flat screen TV. Wait, forgot to ask for directions. Shit."
